Monday, December 1, 2014

Stepping Cautiously into the Holidays

I feel like I'm walking in where things are a bit dark and shadowy, and I have stubbed my toe pretty hard here before, so I'm taking very slow and very careful steps.  However, it's really not dark, and I'm not worried about my toes. It's the holidays.

Y'all, I would SO like to end this dearth of blogging with some bright cheery posts sparkle like the rest of the season, but maybe later if we're lucky.  So far there have been no huge bombs, but all the constant little things are wearing away at me right now. Not to mention that work has been slow, so it makes me feel useless. Then I come home, and there's not much going on there. I think fb and I may have to take a break, or I may have to severely restrict who I'm following. The whole cute kids doing holiday traditions is kicking my butt as well. It's not just work or the holidays, either. The allergies and this year with some losses has been kind of difficult. I can't tell if I'm trying to fight off depression, or if I'm inviting it in for a snuggle.

I do know that I'm tired tonight and that is helping nothing. I also know that I don't want to go to bed dwelling on that, so even though I'm a few days late, how about a few things I'm thankful for?

I'm thankful for a blogging community that listens and cares.

I'm thankful for prayer buddies, knowing that someone is praying for me, and being able to try to offer some of this up for someone else.

I'm thankful for friends that look out for me and drag me to things that I don't always want to go to, because they want me there even if I'm a little difficult sometimes about going. They don't know why I'm so easily overwhelmed or don't want to go, but it always makes me feel better when I do go, and I'm glad they go through a little extra work sometimes to get me there.

I'm thankful that the holidays are, and that they do help us to think of others, and to celebrate with loved ones.

I'm thankful for health and the ability to do the activities I do.

Also very thankful for endorphins!

I'm thankful for a profession that I love.

I'm going to bed now, but hopefully I'll have more to say this month, and I certainly hope that most of it will be about something besides the same old stuff all the time!

9 comments:

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  2. Hugs and prayers and love to you!! I'm sorry things are dark right now...just know that you MATTER!

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  3. I love your positivity at the end of this post...sometimes we have to force ourselves to remember what we're thankful for, but it's always a fruitful exercise. I think this time of year brings mixed feelings for everyone, even the seemingly "happiest" among us...holidays always have a way of reminding us of what we DON'T have, even though they are supposed to do the opposite! Prayers for you, hang in there!!

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  4. The holidays really can be a difficult time of year - but I think you are on the right path: being mindfully thankful. Stepping cautiously into it instead of freezing and refusing to go into it any further. I'm with you on wanting to spread more positivity into my blog. We'll be digging deep to do it together! :)

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  5. I'm not sure whether to be happy I'm not the only one in a funk (it feels awful when it seems like everyone else is in a good mood and having a wonderful time) or sad that you're having a tough time, too. If you don't mind, I think I'll go with both. FB hasn't been my enemy yet, but I am learning that I need to fast forward all commercials. It's just safer that way. Either they feature ridiculously adorable children or, like last night's St. Jude's commercial, make me want to throw something through the TV. (Fortunately I have no problems remembering how new and expensive it was!) I hope that things get better, that both of us can remind ourselves that more than anything, the coming season is about hope and forgiveness/salvation. Hugs and prayers!

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  6. Totally understand the stubbed toe reference. There are so many things that are tough this time of year. Its ok to be real, its awfully hard to go thru another round of holidays single when u feel called to be married and a mother. Prayers.

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  7. This time of year can be so difficult. When you combine the big emphasis on the holidays and family with the short, dark days it is easy to focus on what is missing and it's bound to be tough. Don't be too hard on yourself. I like your attitude of gratefulness.

    BTW, when I first read this post at work I misread the line "Also very thankful for endorphins" as "Also very thankful for dolphins". I was a little confused, but you had me smiling!

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  8. Work has been slower for me to the past couple weeks and will be this month too so I understand how you feel there. A lot of what you are describing is what I have been feeling lately too. I am praying for you from afar my friend! I am also thankful for the endorphins of physical activity :)

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  9. Sending some hugs. I know this time of year is hard for people for lots of different reasons. Hang in there!

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