What a strange day, this Mother's Day. I'd tell you how I was feeling about it, but that would require me knowing how I feel right now.
For myself, I would rather avoid the subject altogether. Most of my friends are celebrating this holiday as mothers. Most of them are younger than me. Several of them that are my age have 4 and 5 kids. Sometimes people seem to think that since I'm single, I only miss having a husband. But my arms are empty, too. I love kids, and though I have a doctorate in a career I love, I'd give it up in a heartbeat if I could (though to be completely honest, my true ideal would be to work less than 10 hours a week, but have a little time to keep practicing). Going to Mass alone each week is not my favorite, but this day sitting alone in a pew for the Mother's Day blessing. Yeah. If Mass were not a requirement.... Oh, well. I can and will avoid facebook!
As for those that I have "met" in the IF world, there's a great mixture of feelings there as well. There are so many that are getting to experience their first Mother's Day as mothers with children in their arms, and others get to celebrate it with new life in their wombs or new hope for adoption. And there are others that are still slogging on the seemingly never ending IF emotional roller coaster, wondering when- or if- their turn will ever come. I am so glad that they have their husband with them on the journey, but I do not envy the up and down of hoping each month that this will be the month. Some will be in the midst of hope while waiting, some will be right around CD1, etc.
And I am very thankful for a mother who is about all you could want in a mother. Our personalities clash a bit on how we deal with things, so I do not always appreciate her like I should, but that has more to do with me being an ungrateful daughter rather than her. She is a born caregiver and wants to take care of everyone that she can. She loves all of us kids, and I don't think that any of us has ever doubted her desire to do anything she can for any of us. She brought us up knowing our faith and why we believe as we do, which is a rare, rare gift. I also know that she prays for all of us constantly.
This is where I am. In the middle of my own frustration, joyful and sorrowful with friends, and so very, very thankful. I guess there is nothing to do but take all the emotions, the good with the bad. For my mother, my prayer today is for you and for your intentions today. For all my friends who are such wonderful mothers, I thank God for you on behalf of your beautiful children. For all still waiting, whether because of singleness, IF or any other reason, I pray that your wait will also bear fruit, that it will end in time and the way that is according to His will (and that it will be soon!). And I leave you with this, because I think I need it today, too.