Thursday, May 28, 2009

Departure

I recently went to an awards ceremony for a group of high school seniors, and I was surprised to realize that it has been 10 years since I graduated.  Many things have gone as I planned, the big ones being going to college and finishing, followed by going to grad school and finishing.  On the other hand, I also thought that I would be married by now, have a few kids, be working on a mortgage payment by now.  You know, the white picket fence and whatnot.

Anyway, I sat at that ceremony and wondered what these kids were hoping for and dreaming about.  I wondered where they would be in 10 years, and what life had in store for each of them.  That also made me think about where I was 10 years ago, and how the desires of my heart had changed while they stayed the same.

I thought about when I was 18 and graduating from high school and headed into college.  I was there for school, but I certainly thought about the meat market.  My parents had met in college, so I assumed that all I had to do was go to college, and I would eventually meet The One.  At that time, I would say that I had a more balanced view of marriage than a lot of people did. I had a lot of great examples in my life; my parents were married 20 years at the time, and my grandparents over 40.  I thought I had it all figured out, because I knew that relationships were hard work and commitment, so I was prepared.

I wanted to meet someone that would love me, that would provide companionship, that I could laugh and cry with, that would go on dates and do fun stuff with me.  My faith was very important, so the main requirement was that he had a strong faith in God.  I preferred a Catholic, but I didn't really care, as long as he loved God.  I did want someone that would not have a problem with me being Catholic, or the kids being Catholic.

At the time, I thought I really needed someone, but I was also distracted by all the fun that is college life and meeting new people.  I wished for a boyfriend, but I knew I wasn't ready to be married yet anyway so it wasn't too bad to wait.  Let's not mention that to the 18-year-old me.  She probably won't listen or agree.

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